The End of Empathy

em•pa•thy [em-puh-thee] noun
1. the intellectual identification with or vicarious experiencing of the feelings, thoughts, or attitudes of another.

At what point does empathy end? Should it ever? Is there a place where it doesn’t belong and where you just need to kick into gear or kick someone else into gear for the sake of “getting over it”? That’s it. When I am down and someone responds without empathy it feels like I’m being kicked and that kick hurts more than a normal kick because I’m already down and bruised. The irony to me is that empathy is, as defined above, “vicariously experiencing the feeling of another” and it often ends before the individual is freed from the feelings or experience that warranted the empathy in the first place.

I put a lot of stock in Scripture. Not as much as I would like when trials arise and I find myself responding in my own “strength” or “understanding” (which of course I have none of outside of Christ). But I think every question can be answered in the character of God- not in a direct reference of Scripture and that’s how I read and re-read those precious words. To know HIM. So when I have a question like “At what point does empathy end?” I don’t have to look for proof texts (or a specific verse that says yes or no) but rather look to the author and finisher of my faith- to my Lord and my Savior. His empathy seems to have no end. When I think over who he is and his incredible patience there is no end but rather He      

• Sits with Job in his desperation and points Job to look at the Creator God and not his awful circumstances
• Listens to all of David’s emotion filled requests and pleas AND ANSWERS THEM
• Guides the Israelites DURING their rebellion in the dessert
• “Then the LORD took pity on his people. He didn't destroy them as he had said he would” Exodus 32:14
• Weeps with the family of his dear friend Lazarus even though Jesus knew that Lazarus would not remain dead
• “For we have not a high priest who is unable to sympathize with our weaknesses, but one who in every respect has been tempted as we are, yet without sin” Hebrews 4:15

And the passage that keeps coming to mind over and over again is

I Thessalonians 5:14, “We urge you, brethren, admonish the unruly, encourage the fainthearted, help the weak, be patient with everyone.”

I love that one because it depicts the response to all kind of different situations and urges the Christian to be careful to care for others WELL in their specific needs. To correct, encourage, and help when appropriate but not to encourage the unruly or to correct the weak because that isn’t best. And the most important thing there is the “be patient with everyone” because no matter where they are at patience is best. And it all ties back because of the intense patience of our Savior who continues to love us to Himself no matter what. That’s my example and the character answer to my question about empathy.